Of all the beauty woes we're struggling with, scalp issues are certainly among the least glamorous. While it’s a bit of an awkward subject — because things like dandruff have long been taboo — a lot of people suffer from scalp flare-ups. And these somewhat embarrassing issues are not only problematic in the dry, winter months, but through sweaty summer days, too.

We assure you that scalp problems are nothing to be embarrassed about. There’s a slew of solutions to soothe itchy dryness, greasy product build-up, and the flaking and irritation that tend to follow. To prove it, we tapped Stephen D. Pullan, a trichologist at the Philip Kingsley Clinic, to give us the lowdown on exactly how to alleviate these uncomfortable issues.

Ahead, seven tips for saving your scalp — whether you’re suffering from a little sunburnt irritation or a wet-looking muck of product buildup. Click through to find an answer to your dandruff dilemmas.

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Call it the Reddit effect: What started as an unassuming selfie shared by London-based YouTube vlogger Michele Manteaw showcasing her poreless skin, perfectly curled lashes, and glossy, glazed lips — has accumulated hundreds of upvotes and comments, with admirers desperate for a breakdown of the routine she titled "Glowy Winter Makeup on Dark Skin."

Over 16,000 upvotes later, Manteaw tells us she never thought her post would drum up so much interest. "The original Reddit post was actually made on my boyfriend's account," Manteaw says. "It's not even an account I use, apart from occasionally sourcing beauty inspiration from MakeupAddiction and SkincareAddiction. But I'm really happy to be able to help others by sharing what I've learned in regards to skin care and makeup."

So, what are the secrets to getting that summertime glow in the dead of winter? For Manteaw, it starts with prepping the skin with loads of moisture, and lots of layering. "I always start by using Lush's Full of Grace Serum bar before I put on my makeup," Manteaw tells us. "It's an almond oil-based serum, and acts like a primer. From there I layer my face makeup. I use lots of products, but I've done a lot of research, and watched hundreds of YouTube videos. If the product is amazing, I don't mind how much it costs."

Manteaw is a testament to the fact that, more often than not, it takes a lot of products — sometimes $545 worth — to look naturally dewy and untouched in photos. In a recent interview with Cosmopolitan, Manteaw broke down her daily skin-care routine, and followed her trending Reddit post with a full breakdown of her makeup must-haves. We put it all together, so you click through to find all 21 products — from cleansing brush to lip gloss — that went toward the glow that sparked a viral beauty sensation.

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When an internet challenge goes viral, people can usually expect the familiar cringe associated with watching teens eat cinnamon or people doing things they shouldn't be doing while blindfolded. But the latest challenge to grip social media is much more wholesome (we hope), and celebrities are especially obsessed with it.

The #10YearChallenge is simple: post a photo of yourself in 2009 beside a current 2019 one. Many people have taken the opportunity to gloat and show off their agelessness. Others have used it as a moment to show just how significant their glow-up has been, to varying degrees of hilarity. There's even a theory that all of these then-and-now split-screen photos will one day be mined by Facebook to train a facial recognition algorithm on age progression. Celebrities have gotten creative with the meme and tailored it the way they want, to the delight — and sometimes, horror — of fans.

Here are some of the best celebrity #10YearChallenge photos out there.

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We're not always the first to admit it, but the truth is, we love leggings. Sure, they might not always be the most stylish choice. But when you're running to the bodega for last-minute dinner party supplies or sleepwalking to your local coffee shop, there's no better pair of throw-on-and-go pants. Or is there? What if we told you that there's a new pant trend rising in the ranks that feel like ultra soft leggings, but look so much better?

Introducing the 2019 alternative to leggings: the flared stretch pants we've been spotting on every retailer's website, from Urban Outfitters to Net-A-Porter. Unlike their skinny-legged predecessor, these new pull-on styles go the distance when it comes to options. From floral-patterned bells by Acne Studios to split-leg trousers courtesy of The Row, we've rounded up all the best picks of this new trend.

So pack away your rainy day leggings and take these equally lush, but much more fashion-forward stretch flares for a spin.

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All shampoos aren't your friend. At least, that's what a few stripping, harsh formulas have taught us over the years. While most liquid lathers are free of drying agents (we're talking about you, sulfates) and full of nourishing ingredients, some of them can leave your hair feeling (and looking) parched. It's why so many pros preach the importance of keeping a good conditioner in your routine to keep hair balanced.

But if you frequently shampoo your strands and find that your hair and scalp is dry, it may be time to consider adding a cleansing conditioner into the mix. Cleansing conditioners are designed to gently free your strands of debris, while softening and conditioning the hair at the same time.

"The right cleansing conditioner can work wonders on a variety of textures, especially curly and chemically processed hair," Jaxcee, color director at Hair Rules tells Refinery29. " Unlike traditional sudsing shampoos, they provide the perfect balance of detoxing your hair from dirt, sweat, excess oil, and product buildup, while not stripping your hair of its natural oils," she says.

Though you shouldn't totally eliminate shampooing — your hair needs a deep clean every so often — using a cleansing conditioner between washes can make a huge difference in the softness and manageability of your strands. Ahead, find our favorite formulas for different hair types.

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Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals are great, but there's something about a post-holiday, new year sale — the kind you can casually shop from the comfort of your couch after Marie Kondo-ing your closet — that's a lot more enjoyable. Of all the big stockroom-clearing sales going down this month, the best one is happening at Bath & Body Works. The brand's semi-annual sale is underway right now, with insane deals both online and in stores.

For a limited time, you can grab all the B&BW goods you love — select jumbo candles, scented shower gels and body lotions, plug-in fragrances, and foaming hand soaps — for up to 75% off retail price. As an added bonus, this sale includes over 50 of the brand's formerly-retired fragrances — like White Tea & Ginger, Pink Chiffon, and Oahu Coconut Sunset — available in all scented forms (body lotion, shower gel, and fragrance mist) for a limited time only.

Head over to the site and scroll through all the sale items, or check out the best picks from the mega sale, ahead. With deals this good, you can stock your bathroom with lemony fresh hand soap, Pink Chiffon body butter, and coffee table candles for all of 2019.

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2018 was the year we finally grasped the purpose of a Netflix movie. They're there to create unforgettable internet moments, experienced together. To All the Boys I Loved Before and Set It Up reminded us, after a long drought, that we do indeed love the romantic comedy. Bandersnatch had us waking up at seven in the morning to try out all the different possible endings before work. After a flurry of memes, Bird Box eventually inspired an ill-advised real world challenge. And that's not even touching on Netflix's award show hopefuls, like Roma and The Ballad of Buster Scruggs.

If all of that happened in 2018, then what does 2019 hold for the Netflix Original Films front? At least two romantic comedies are on the lineup. We'll also see new movies from Dee Rees, Michael Bay, and Martin Scorsese, and a movie starring all your favorite Saturday Night Live women.

Here are the originals coming to an account near you.

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When Caroline Calloway, a 27-year-old Instagram influencer and writer, abruptly cancelled her tour of creativity workshops scheduled across America, all eyes were watching. Her lofty endeavors had gained notoriety on Twitter after writer Kayleigh Donaldson began documenting what she felt were Calloway's ill-advised attempts to throw together a multi-city tour that promised teachings, lunch, care packages, and personalized letters for every attendee.

"This woman is a blatant scammer who's now organizing a WORLDWIDE TOUR with this 'workshop' she admits she wrote in one day, I think it's categorical bullshit that nobody is talking about & that we glorify this 'influencer' nonsense," Donaldson tweeted. She later expanded in her own piece on the saga.

It wasn't long before Calloway found Donaldson's Twitter thread and ultimately cancelled her remaining dates, saying the criticism was "really valid" and ceded that "preparation was inadequate" and the event did not live up to what people had paid $165 (plus fees) for.

That Instagram influencer I occasionally check in on because she's The Worst is now charging $165 for a 4 hour "seminar" on how to be yourself. pic.twitter.com/zLvBFn9dPI

— Kayleigh Donaldson (@Ceilidhann) December 20, 2018

In its wake, voyeurs began referring to this whole experience as "Fyre Festival 2," and accused Calloway of purposefully scamming her fans into paying too much for a workshop that was never going to deliver. However, I don't see Calloway as a scammer. She's Tana Mongeau, the vlogger who wanted to throw a convention for her fans and ended up getting in way over her head, resulting in disaster.

Calloway doesn't have bad intentions, but she's no stranger to plans gone awry. Let's start at the beginning.

Who is Caroline Calloway?

She is a 27-year-old writer living in New York City.

Why do people follow her?

Her popularity began when she attended Cambridge University and documented her life on Instagram with long captions and a fairy-tale like tone that has since earned her over 830 thousand followers. It also earned her a $500,000 book deal, that she eventually pulled out of, putting her over $100 thousand in debt. Now, she makes longform Instagram Stories about her life in New York City.

View this post on Instagram

Much like Ring Pops and disposable razors, memories deteriorate with use. It’s science. According to a study by Northwestern University, every time we access a memory we tamper with it, editing the past with our feelings in the present. Or to put it like this: the only way to preserve our most precious memories is to forget them. Sometimes I worry that I’ve revisited my first weeks at Cambridge so often that the real story is too damaged to tell with accuracy—that something about the star-struck, devastated, bewildered way I felt when I arrived has been permanently paved over. I know now, for example, that Oscar and I will end up dating. We will spend Valentine’s Day in Paris and weekends at castles and untold hours of our lives watching movies on laptops. Cambridge will not always be a beautiful but hellish maze. I will, eventually, learn the street names; the college names; where to buy falafel at 3 AM (Gardies). I will even become friends with Josh after many upbeat and infrequent lunches in Manhattan. Once—and only once—Josh will say the name Oscar by mistake. “George,” I will correct him quickly. “The royal baby’s name is George.” But in the moment that this photo happened I couldn’t have imagined what was to come. And in fact, at this moment now, it’s hard for me to imagine how this photo felt. During the past week I’ve asked so many friends (spoiler alert: I make friends) what Cambridge was like at first and they all say it was a whirlwind. They cite Bambi-like awe. And sure, I get it. But when I look at this photo I see a staged kind of fun. Where is my jacket? Did I throw it out of frame, but keep the champagne? Why am I looking off into the distance? I had definitely asked for this photo to be taken. What I’m trying to say is that wonder can often run parallel to loneliness. And while the emotional sum of my first weeks at Cambridge would eventually add up to happiness, this photo was probably not the extraordinary moment it looks like. Sneaking past the porters wasn’t actually that hard. Conversation that afternoon with Oscar lulled. Things were real. And they would only get surreal-er. To Be Continued… #adventuregrams

A post shared by Caroline Calloway (@carolinecalloway) on Jan 20, 2015 at 5:00pm PST

What are these "workshops"?

Despite the failure of her book deal, Calloway still has clout for her ability to gain a social media following (at the time of publication, Calloway currently boasts 830K followers) and successfully maintain her audience. “I tried to give them really tangible skills, like setting aside time and scheduling, and being scrappy about it," she told BuzzFeed News in a recent interview. "You don’t have to wait to be in a white cube gallery to write a great novel. Like, I make a lot of my Instagram content while I’m on the elliptical.” It's stuff like this that she promised to teach at these creativity workshops, but at its core, it was just an opportunity for her and her active community of fans (she has many fan accounts dedicated to her writing, relationships, and outfits) to be in the same room.

Why were people mad?

It depends who you ask. (Calloway did not respond to Refinery29's request for comment.) Those who watched from afar first noted the steep price of $165 per ticket, but Calloway was promising a lot of perks. For instance, the four-hour event included a homemade lunch, individualized care packages and letters, homemade Orchid crowns, and a meet and greet, in addition to Calloway's teaching.

One by one, these promises fell out the window as Calloway realized just how much she was undertaking. She had, apparently, not allowed herself enough time between the initial conception of the tour and the actual scheduled ticketed events. She was unable to produce the 50-ish care packages and individualized letters in time, and cooking for that many people in her studio apartment proved unbearable — she documented such on her Insta stories. Instead, fans were given mason jars with seeds in them (not to eat, but to grow), a personalized notebook, and a crystal that turned out to be a rock. Future dates would have to settle for carrots and hummus rather than a cooked lunch. The Orchid crowns also disappeared when Calloway realized she instead needed the flower crown fund to pay photographers to take portraits at the event. (She originally wanted to hire unpaid interns before facing — there's a trend here — backlash.)

update: RE: the Caroline Calloway scam, she bought 1200 mason jars to give her fans “wildflower gardens” turns out this was an empty mason jar and some seeds. she’s traveling around with a huge suitcase of empty mason jars. these people paid $165 for AN EMPTY MASON JAR. pic.twitter.com/FS4IiDvTHG

— Catherine Britt (@catbritt) January 14, 2019

However, attendees of the two workshops Calloway did manage to host, in both New York City and Washington D.C. with about 50 attendees at each, don't feel scammed because as loyal followers of Calloway, they knew what they were getting into.

“I knew it was unplanned, and honestly never expected her to fulfill most of the bizarre promises she kept adding,” an anonymous woman told BuzzFeed News. “Caroline is a human who has genuine heart, overwhelming empathy, a preoccupation with wealth, and a shallow conception of what it means to be authentic — that anyone can clearly see.

“I just wanted to go hear her workshop for a few hours and hear what she had to say. I justified it as being about the amount I’d spend on a concert for someone I really loved,” another fan wrote on Reddit. “I don’t think anyone didn’t have fun.”

But the drama escalated when, after just two workshops, Calloway offered her followers an alternative: What if all the workshops were hosted in New York City and they just flew to meet her? When she shared the news on Insta stories, the two options to vote on the last minute change were “This is our space!” or “FUCK yes.” There was no option to disagree.

When did she cancel them?

pic.twitter.com/DASvtUe42i

— ◥◤Caroline Calloway (@carolinecaloway) January 14, 2019

After Donaldson's thread on the fiasco went viral (even Seth Rogen shared it), Calloway announced via Twitter and Instagram that she was cancelling the tour and refunding all those who bought tickets, including for those who attended the workshops in New York City and Washington D.C. This happened on Monday, January 14.

People immediately noticed that Eventbrite's policy did not allow refunds within 30 days of the event — a time frame both the New York and D.C. events fell into — which would seemingly complicate the process.

“We don’t believe she was trying to be a fraudster or a bad actor — sometimes things just don’t go as planned,” Amanda Livingood, a spokesperson for Eventbrite, told BuzzFeed.

Has she said anything in response to all this attention?

Other than her initial statement on the tour's cancellation, Calloway has only spoken to BuzzFeed News about the viral moment.

“I wanted to create an experience that would be my perfect weekend day, with cozy acoustic music and a plant-filled space. If I had known how hard it was, I never would've tried," she explained, later adding, "I said I didn’t plan this because I’m dumb, but that’s not true. I didn’t plan well because I didn't know. I would be dumb if I did it again like this.”

Now what?

The tour is back on, baby. In a statement on January 16 on Insta stories , Calloway declared she wouldn't let those who want her to fail just for entertainment purposes to stop her, and that she'll let the lessons she's learned from this tour shape her workshops going forward. No dates or locations have been announced.

Presented without comment. pic.twitter.com/QAJtNM8tna

— Kayleigh Donaldson (@Ceilidhann) January 16, 2019

Now all we need is Shane Dawson to do another documentary on this saga, and we'll finally know the truth (no, seriously, we asked Shane Dawson and will update if we hear back).

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Eyeliner is wonderful — there's nothing like a bold graphic line or subtle cat-eye flick to make any look pop — but applying eyeliner is a different story altogether. Unless you've mastered the craft (and more power to you), drawing lines on the lids can get dicey, a struggle that ends with you looking like you fell asleep with a Sharpie in your hand. But what if we told you that there are options out there that are actually ideal for beginners... and you might even have had them in your makeup bag this entire time?

Potted gel liners aren't just for fine-arts majors; in fact, they're deceptively easy to use. "The great thing about gel liner is that you can use the formula with any type of brush, and it’s easier to control because you have time before it dries down," says Cassandra Garcia, lead editorial makeup artist for Bobbi Brown. "You can also easily layer it, and if you make a mistake you can use your finger to blend and create an easy smokey eye."

So, if you're still at beginner level (like 80% of the eyeliner-wearing world) or just want to take a break from liquid formulas, it might be time to add a gel to your routine. Ahead, we round up the best gel eyeliners to help you fake it 'til you make it as a liner pro. No worries — your secret's safe with us.

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Madelaine Petsch is largely known to her fans as Cheryl Blossom, the high-school mean girl turned Southside Serpent on Riverdale. But as we've learned with her co-stars, Camila Mendes (who plays Veronica Lodge) and Lili Reinhart (who plays Betty Cooper), Petsch is not her character. In fact, the only thing the two share is their red hair color.

Petsch's fiery red hair color is almost as important to Cheryl Blossom's mainframe as her quick comebacks and archery skills. In fact, when the show first aired two years ago, early fans rushed to the internet to find out if Petsch's vibrant color was, in fact, real. Turns out, it is.

"My hair is very much real," she told Flare in 2017. "If I dyed my hair, my mother would actually disown me." Despite the fact that we've known the truth for awhile now, it hasn't stopped us from wanting to know more about Petsch's now-famous, signature look. So, we tracked down her go-to hairstylist, Marc Mena, to get the details — and he told us everything.

Check out Mena's favorite products, learn how he keeps Petsch's look different from Cheryl's, and discover the haircut he hopes she gets when Riverdale ends, ahead.

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There's been a wave of international influence on the American beauty market in the last few years. From K-beauty skin care to French-girl makeup, brands from all over the world have been appearing in our favorite U.S. stores, consuming our Instagram feeds, and inspiring new beauty trends. And as unique beauty communities get more attention in the beauty aisle, we're seeing an uptick in brands owned by Latinx men and women.

The Latinx community prides itself in having a strong connection to la belleza. And it has given birth to some of the most talented makeup and hair artists and created some of the best beauty hacks. But before now, the Latinx consumer hasn't been fully represented in the beauty space — whether it be in foundation shades or curly hair products — which is why some entrepreneurs took it upon themselves to create new brands that speak directly to their specific needs and culture.

In the recent months, the Latinx consumer is finally getting some much-needed time in the spotlight. From curly hair products to fragrances inspired by Mexico, these are the Latinx-owned beauty brands you should support right now.

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There's only one reason to post a photo of a body of water — be it an ocean at sunset, a pool full of unicorn floats, or a bubbling bathtub — and that is to show that you are relaxing better than everyone else. What doesn't convey that you're having the most well-deserved and stylish pamper sesh of all time? Black grout between tiles, murky water, Summer's Eve wash in the corner...

Ahead, the products you need to convince your friends you're soaking in a tub far fancier than the one in your pre-war studio. As for faking that infinity pool shot at the Holiday Inn, you're on your own.

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On Wednesday, Virgil Abloh presented his latest collection for his label Off-White during Paris Men's Fashion Week featuring a few familiar faces, like rappers Playboi Carti and Cardi B's (maybe, soon-to-be) ex-husband Offset who walked very slowly along the runway almost as if to say "do you see this coat?!" Abloh, King Hypebeast, dressed Kulture's father in an oversized maxi puffer coat with a built in crossbody fanny pack, graphic T-shirt, black pants, and dad sneakers. This isn't the first time Offset modeled during Fashion Week. Last September, the 27-year-old walked in Jeremy Scott's New York show.

However, back in the City of Light, Offset, nee Kiari Cephus, is having what appears to be the best time ever. In between Instagramming himself on photoshoots and backstage at Virgil's show (where he got his skin touched up before hitting the runway), the Migos rapper was photographed out and about wearing baggy striped Gunther Paris pants, a rope around his waist and a black Balenciaga turtleneck. But the real star of the show was his white shearling Louis Vuitton coat. Earlier in the week, he wore yellow neon pants and a tie-dye fleece sweatshirt, both Abloh for Louis Vuitton. On Tuesday, he took in the Gunther Paris show in a noticeably more muted, but chic look wearing a kimono-style top, cuffed jeans and sneakers.

He may need help when it comes to picking out luxury gifts for Cardi B but when it comes to men's fashion, the rapper can walk it like he talks it.

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If you want to shop at Target — and stay on budget! — then you need a strategy: written lists, Cartwheel discounts, hell, maybe even a map of the store (so as not to be diverted by whatever Joanna Gaines just launched). We get it, you're only human and distractions happen. More often than not, they come from the giant trap expertly placed just a few feet from the registers: the beauty section.

Walking by Target's beauty offerings is overwhelming at best. From shaving cream to acne-fighting face masks, you're bound to browse off course. And in case you do, we recommend starting in the hair aisle first. January is when the biggest brands, including Garnier, Aveeno, and Tresemmé, roll out the most exciting launches of the year. In other words, it's prime time to revamp your haircare routine to include a new clarifying shampoo or weekly scalp scrub. Even better: Not one product will cost you more than $20. How can you resist?

Keeping clicking to check out the 18 best new hair products hitting Target right now.

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There are two types of people when it comes to haircuts: There are those who squint at the sight of shears for a two-inch trim, and those who walk in the salon with box braids and walk out with a buzz cut. Monica Ananonu, a freelance illustrator, falls into the latter category.

In the latest episode of Hair Me Out, Ananonu crops her hair down to a fade and dyes it platinum blonde for a look inspired by Frank Ocean’s Blonde album art. “I guess I’m nervous because my hair grows really slowly, so cutting it all off will be a journey,” she says.

Prior to her big chop, Ananonu spent nearly 10 hours installing her own box braids on the regular. "I'm excited to have a style that's a lot quicker," she says. At Salon Kazumi in Beverly Hills, stylist Aaron Watkins cut her blonde braids from the root (a sight that would give any protective-style enthusiast goosebumps). Then, Kazumi colorists lifted her jet-black hair to a warm honey shade that Frank Ocean would 100% approve of.

Press play to see her dramatic transformation IRL.

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The time between mid-January and the end of the month is known as the turning point when serious shoppers who’ve kept quiet behind their shopping carts come out of the woodwork and get down to business. Because that's right, we’re officially in the home-stretch of the designer sale season and if bloggers who get everything for free start sharing what they bought on Instagram: you know the designer deals are GOOD.

For weeks since Boxing Day, retailers have been seriously redlining their luxury offerings — but it’s right now when the prices of the Chloé boots or the Ganni dress you’ve been eyeing all season are slashed even further (seriously, up to 70% off). So if you’ve been holding off on scoring your dream designer item, this is your moment to shine. And if you’re on the fence of what to buy or need a little help to strategize what’s actually worth it out there, we’ve rounded up a few from brands like Net-A-Porter, Shopbop, and Saks Fifth Avenue that will give you all the feels. But you better act fast because one of those serial shoppers may beat you to that last and final find.

All products in this roundup reflect the price and availability at story publish time/date.

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We don't know where Michelle Obama is right this very moment, or what she's doing, but we do know one thing: She is glowing. We say this confidently because, over the past few years (most notably since leaving the White House) the former FLOTUS has sported an omnipresent, lit-from-within radiance that'd make the women in a Vermeer painting jealous.

While a devotion to a healthy lifestyle is partly to thank, Mrs. Obama's glow also has a secret weapon: Jennifer Brodeur, the Montreal-based "skin guru" who's been working with Obama since 2014, and just recently tagged along with Obama's makeup artist Carl Ray on the Becoming book tour.

With 20 years of experience, Brodeur specializes in skin strategies for her many clients (Oprah Winfrey included), mixing custom serums and prescribing facial regimens that will continue to improve their complexions for years to come. On the occasion of Mrs. Obama's 55th birthday, Brodeur is sharing her tips, tricks, and favorite memories working with the most recognizable face on the planet.

Meeting Michelle

"It was all through Ms. Winfrey, and we actually met during Mrs. Obama’s 50th birthday. We first did a few facials together at a private location. Then I got a callback a few weeks later from her team, who wanted me to meet with her again, and we came up with a six-month strategy for her skin. What was beautiful about the first meeting was that she was a true believer of not just a healthy lifestyle and self-care and self-love, but also being as natural as possible and aging gracefully.

"The most memorable time with her was the first time I was in the White House. I was just doing my job and it was when I left the White House that I realized, Oh my god, I just gave a facial at the White House. Then going to the DCA airport and seeing all these magazines around me with them on the cover and thinking, Oh my god, I just did that. "

The FLOTUS Face

"I thought her skin was amazing, considering the circumstances. The makeup is constant and they always have to be camera-ready. But there are a lot of challenges with darker skin. My whole thought process was: How do we make your skin more even, in regards to the coloring and pigmentation?

"I’m not a big believer in peels or exfoliation. We started with an anti-inflammatory system and then it was about integrating more vitamin Cs and then vitamin A in the evening. There are times when I'm mixing up bespoke serums or potions that show up to her door with no name in little strange pots. There’s a trust there. After we helped that hyperpigmentation, it was about making sure the skin was as hydrated and dewy as possible.

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A post shared by JB Skinguru (@jbskinguru) on Jul 19, 2018 at 1:02pm PDT

Her Product Entourage

"Usually before a speaking engagement, I love to give her a collagen-based vitamin C facial. I use a gel-based collagen in which I’ll infuse vitamin C and then I'll use oxygen to make sure the skin absorbs as much as possible. And then I always incorporate our LED device, which is called Max. Often I'll use the yellow light [setting], and it really helps with that glow of the skin.

"The one thing I always make sure we have on hand is withinUs — it’s a collagen supplement that’s vital for flying. It has great electrolytes and hydrates from within. I always recommend to fly without makeup on; even if the planes are private planes, there’s environmental pollution that clogs up the skin. And then our favorite go-to is the Peoni L'extrait oil. It’s an anti-inflammatory and makes sure the skin stays very hydrated. She can even use it on her cuticles."

The Real Glow Secret

"She learned from a very young age that she needed to put herself first. The whole gesture of cleansing your skin and applying your serums and creams, all of those things you can do for yourself and it’s the best display of self-love — it’s not vanity. If there’s one thing [Mrs. Obama] taught me from the first day I met her was, It’s OK to stand up tall. When you’re around her, you want to stand taller. That’s the grace that she exudes. It’s about being your best self. I'm so proud that I'm on this journey with her, especially because she's showing us there's no age limit on becoming who you want to be."

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Welcome toMoney Diaries , where we're tackling what might be the last taboo facing modern working women: money. We're asking millennials how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we're tracking every last dollar.

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Today: a stay-at-home mom who also works as a dog boarder and makes $20,000 per year ($200,000 when combined with her husband) and spends some of her money this week on

Occupation: Stay-at-home mom, part-time dog boarder
Industry: Mom and Pet Care
Age: 36
Location: Placerville, CA
My Salary: $20,000 from dog boarding
My Husband's Salary: $180,000
My Husband's Paycheck Amount (Biweekly): $5,000 (Everything else — like if he gets a bonus or a promotion, or anything from stocks he gets through work — is put into savings.)

Monthly Expenses
Mortgage: We own our home and pay $2,000 toward our mortgage. I live with my husband, six-year-old kid, and a dog.
Camper Payment: $120
Electricity: $150
Gas: $100
Internet: $100
Cell Phone: $150
Car Insurance: $75
TV Subscriptions: $60 (This includes HBO, Hulu, Netflix & Amazon Prime.)
Apple Music: $15
My Son's Piano Lessons: $90
My Son's Karate Lessons: $70
Savings For My Son: $100
Ritual Vitamins: $30

Day One

6:30 a.m. — I wake up and quickly scroll through my emails, Facebook, and Instagram, hoping the next time I check it will be at night. My New Year's resolution is to be more present and not spend as much time on my phone scrolling through stupid stuff. I'm trying to check social media once in the morning and once at night only. I chug water and feed the dog and prepare breakfast for T., my six-year-old.

8:15 a.m. — T. is fed! He gets leftover waffles from the weekend. As he gets dressed, T.'s dad, BD (baby daddy, ha!) rolls out of bed to take T. to school. I used to take T. to school every morning and do pick ups every afternoon, but this school year BD decided to step up. It's nice not to have to change out of my warm onesie and drive in the cold rain. BD returns home to make his coffee and grabs some hard boiled eggs for breakfast before he runs downstairs for his morning meeting. He is in software development and works from home.

9:30 a.m. — My friend E. wants to go gamble at the casino for a bit. She's asked three times in four days already, so I agree. We've only known each other for a few years, but she's my closest friend here. We're very different in that she's loud and has this nonstop manic energy. But we have a lot in common and mesh really well, so we try to catch up when we can, even if that means going to a casino at 10 in the morning on a Monday! We end up staying for 2.5 hours trying random slot machines and playing roulette. We both end up losing money but I fared better. $40

12 p.m. — I have to get blood work done, but we make plans to have lunch right after. Every four weeks I get my blood drawn. I have auto immune and inflammation issues which causes severe and painful psoriasis on my skin and psoriatic arthritis in my joints. Last May was the first time where my skin has been completely clear from psoriasis since it first started, back in 1997 when I was 15. It's been incredible! However, I am apprehensive about it coming back in the winter because the weather is so cold and drying. But currently it's the New Year and so far so good! Unfortunately, my joints are another issue. I can't tell if it's the rain or my new diet that's making them ache. BD has wonderful insurance through his work, so it pays for most of the bill, and I pay what's left over. $14

12:45 p.m. — I meet back up with E., and I order a salad and 12 wings. The salad bar is kind of sad. I hate iceberg lettuce and the spinach is wet. But that doesn't stop me from clearing my plate and all of my wings. E. and I are on a keto diet, with me recently starting over again. I tried for a month last year but worried that all the fatty meats and cheeses were bad for my inflammation so I stopped. I find that I'm still worried about that today. $22

2:30 p.m. — I come home and am greeted by BD, T., and the dog. As I drive in, T. happily claps his hand in this adorable way, then runs over to give me a hug. I love him! I stay outside to watch him ride his four wheeler and throw the ball to the dog. The dog is high energy and can play fetch for hours. BD is on a five-hour work call. Afterwards, we go inside to start on homework. I give T. a snack of leftover pork chili verde with rice and black beans. Then I make him nap because he has his first basketball practice of the season with a coach I low key admire (he comes off a little cocky), and I want him at his best. While he sleeps I wash dishes, sweep, water all of my plants, and start the laundry.

5:30 p.m. — I wake T. up with hot chocolate, and we rush to basketball practice. He does really great and I'm super proud of him. T. is athletic, but not a natural, so he has to work harder to get at a level that isn't disappointing. I'm a competitive person, and I'm working on not pushing him too hard. But it's tough for me to not get frustrated when he's busy messing around and not focusing!

7:45 p.m. — We rush home to get T. in a bath, eat dinner (leftover corn chowder with bacon), and get ready for bed. I make a big salad (healthy!) and small bowl of delicious leftover pizza dip (not healthy!) for my dinner. I slice up some oranges for dessert, and BD and I end up watching the first episode of Salt Fat Acid Heat on Netflix. I love it! I've never heard of Samin Nosrat, but she's pretty wonderful. Great, now I'm craving focaccia. We're about to start the second episode, but I'm the kind of person that needs more than eight hours of sleep or else I'm complete garbage the next day. I do my facial skin care routine, brush my teeth, chug water and head to bed by 10 p.m....where I scroll online for the next two hours. Sigh.

Daily Total: $76

Day Two

6 a.m. — I wake up but try to sleep in until my alarm goes off at 7. I reluctantly roll out of bed and chug some water. I feed the dog and prep T.'s breakfast, which is leftover fried rice and orange chicken. I make him do a practice spelling test then work on his sight words. I read to him for 15 minutes, then make him get ready for school. BD and T. are out the door by 8:15. I scroll through social media and my emails.

9:30 a.m. — I go outside to play with the dog for about 30 minutes. I'm ready to play, but he's ignoring me and playing with the ball by himself. But I can't leave because he pops his head up every so often to make sure I'm still there. If I go back inside he runs back to the sliding door and stares sadly at me. So I sit and wait for him to notice me and when he does, I wave for him to bring me the ball so we can finally play fetch. He happily does and now we're rolling. The dog is deaf, by the way. There's a lot of exaggerated hand signals when it comes to communicating with him.

10 a.m. — I have to go shopping for food so my first stop is at Grocery Outlet. I buy Italian sausage, pork, Doritos, pretzels and popcorn for T.'s lunch and BD's new snacking habit since he's stopped drinking and smoking seven months ago. I also buy marinated salmon, blueberries, egg noodles, sunflower seeds, and two packs of bacon. $60.39

11 a.m. — Then I drive to Safeway for everything else. I buy salad, cherry tomatoes, organic chicken, a beef roast, cauliflower, cheese crisps, onions, Texas toast, and cream puffs. $95.05

12 p.m. — I need to get gas. I'm also getting hungry and glance wistfully at Starbucks since I've recently discovered their sou vide egg bites with bacon and gruyere, but I have a trunk full of groceries so I save it for another day. I make a pit stop at the library and head home to unpack. I make cauliflower fried rice for lunch using cauliflower, an old zucchini, and the beef from a leftover Asian stir fry. I'm a pro at reusing (and reheating) leftovers. $35

2 p.m. — I answer some emails and respond to requests for overnight dog boarding. I've been been boarding dogs in my home for over three years now using a website called Rover. BD's salary allows us to live comfortably in California. We are lucky to be able to take a couple domestic vacations a year, an international vacation every other year, and T. is fortunate to have the opportunity to do sports and other activities all year round. While I don't spend money on expensive clothes and fancy hair cuts, I do have expensive tastes in foods and travels, so I started working on Rover to supplement our income. My paycheck varies depending on how open I want my schedule to be, but last year I made about $20,000. Of course BD makes way more money than I do, but we do share everything we make. I have a pup coming later this week, and she'll be staying for three nights. I have another coming for two nights at the same time. I need to make sure they'll get along.

3 p.m. — I pick up T., and we practice basketball at his school. Four other kids join in, so I sit out and scroll through Instagram (whoops). But then I realize what I'm doing so I stop and join them in basketball only to realize how out of shape I am. At 4, I drop T. off at karate and go for a walk while I FaceTime my sister. Afterwards, I text BD to start on dinner while I wait for T. to finish karate. I also snack on two turkey and cheese roll ups that I bought from home.

6 p.m. — I come home to find the green beans nicely sautéed and the potatoes roasted but the roasted BBQ chicken isn't smelling too good. I tentatively take a few bites and it tastes funky. Yay, bubble guts! I throw the chicken in the trash and warm up leftover walnut prawns from the weekend and give that to T. with the veggies. BD ends up ordering pizza. He's on another five-hour work call so I let T. eat, then we finish his reading homework. Afterwards, he draws and watches a quick show while I do the dishes, fold and put away laundry. I feed the dog, make T. his school lunch, then make myself dinner: salad with the last of the pizza dip.

7:45 p.m. — T. prepares for bed, but then BD comes upstairs and decides he wants T. to practice piano so they do a short lesson. I clean up some more, scroll online on my laptop, do my face, and I'm in bed by 10 but I don't fall asleep until after midnight.

Daily Total: $190.44

Day Three

7 a.m. — We do the same morning routine. T.'s breakfast is the last of the corn chowder. I remind T. to do today's chore which is to get the trash from the bathroom, throw it away in the kitchen, and then reline the trash can. He's out the door by 8:15. Last week I watched a few episodes of Netflix's new series on the KonMari method, and now I've decided to purge. I'm generally a neat person and get grumpy if the house is dirty or untidy because when I see clutter, it makes my mind feel cluttered. Keeping up after a six-year-old, a husband who “doesn't mind mess,” and dog guests can be overwhelming sometimes. But today, I'm just running around the house picking up random items to see if it "sparks joy in me." Ching! I end up with a whole bag of trash and another bag to donate! I also prepare dinner which is a copy cat version of Panda Express's black pepper chicken and a keto friendly cauliflower mash for me. I also sweep, do more dishes, and dust.

12 p.m. — I warm up yesterday's cauliflower fried rice. It's not that great, and I'm glad there's no more left. I'm trying to be more aware of portion control, and I think the bowl I had for lunch is of normal size, but I'm still left hungry. I think about making a couple turkey and cheese roll ups but don't.

1 p.m. — I make and eat two turkey and cheese roll ups with cornichons and almonds. I also go on Amazon and order Deathwish Coffee for BD and a neck/back massager for me that I've been considering for over a month. $92

3 p.m. — I pick T. up from school, and we go to the library. He plays with toys, and I look for books about traveling in Japan. E. and I are thinking about planning a trip there this year. I remind myself to open up my Duolingo app again and try to learn some basic Japanese. We get home around 5, and I make dinner and get T. to do homework. He eats his dinner then takes a bath.

6:45 p.m. — I forget that BD has set up a practice fire alarm. I don't look forward to it because it's raining outside. Of course when it starts, T. is surprised by the drill and frantically runs around trying to find his raincoat and boots while covering his ears. We rush out the door towards our meeting point via our escape plan. Afterwards, we go inside and help T. find all of the smoke detectors. When school started, BD wanted T. to join Cub Scouts but there wasn't a leader available so BD volunteered. He takes his role pretty seriously, and I like that they're doing something together where I don't have to be involved. Knowing your escape plan in case of a fire is one of the things a Cub Scout has to know so we just checked it off our list. Yay! Now T. can get his next prize or badge or whatever it is they get!

7:30 p.m. — We go through the usual bedtime routine for T. BD eats the dinner I made earlier, and I make myself a bowl, too. It's a lot saltier than I prefer since I'm not eating it with rice. BD gives me some stressful news about his work. There were some unexpected layoffs last year, and then suddenly some more today. His job is safe this year but he's not sure about next year. We talk about downsizing our home and any other options. I want carbs but end up stress eating some almonds, another turkey and cheese roll up, and my cauliflower mash that smells like fart but tastes pretty good. I head to bed by 10 but take a sleeping pill because I haven't slept well for the past two nights.

Daily Total: $92

Day Four

6 a.m. — I wake up earlier than normal because I forgot to take my Cosentyx shot last night for my psoriasis and arthritis. I'm supposed to take two shots a month, but I've been taking one every three weeks to slowly try and wean off the medication. Last year, when my insurance renewed, I had to pay over $3,000 for them before the insurance could kick back in! I don't want to be dependent on them forever, so I started trying to get healthier. After I take my shot, I have extra time to make T. French toast for breakfast. We do our usual morning routine and he's off to school.

10 a.m. — I clean and tidy up the house. I'm preparing for a dog guest who will be dropped off soon. B. is a very smart dog, but she's an alpha and can get a little aggressive unpredictably. She plays well with our dog, but I have another guest coming tomorrow so I will be on high alert until they both leave. When B. visits, I spend most of the time playing fetch with her and our dog. She is also a high energy pup, and I need to tire her out. For lunch, I make salmon with cauliflower mash and green beans.

3 p.m. — I pick up T. from school, and we practice more basketball. Today, I have him work on dribbling and catching rebounds. Afterwards, I drop T. off at karate and rush home to prepare dinner which is spaghetti with Italian sausage, salad, and Texas toast. I make myself a chicken salad over actual salad. I play another quick game of fetch and feed both dogs. Then I rush back out to pick T. up.

7:30 p.m. — We've finished homework and our nightly routine. I take a shower and focus on my facial routine. In 2016 I got into the 10-step Korean skincare routine. I've narrowed it down to what works best for me in terms of money and time. It's usually a double cleanser (or a quick facial wipe in the morning), toner, snail mucin serum, moisturizer (a heavier one at night), eye cream (and SPF during the day). I also try to exfoliate, and use a cream mask and a clay mask weekly. I'm in bed again by 10 and manage to stay off my phone.

Daily Total: $0

Day Five

6 a.m. — My Friday mornings are more hectic than usual because it's the day I volunteer in T.'s class. I get up earlier because I need to tire out the dogs before I leave. I also put more effort into my morning routine and even put on some make-up. In addition to our usual morning routine, I frantically dump ingredients into the crock pot for tonight's dinner: Mississippi pot roast. I take T. to school and give him a dollar to buy a cup of hot chocolate while I rush to the office to sign in. I want to start volunteering early so I can leave early to greet my next dog guest drop off. $1

10 a.m. — I make it in time to greet my next guest. P. is squishy and adorable and also deaf. I make sure to take a picture and text it to her mom to reassure her that everything's going well. Most of the time, my guests are pretty laid back, but every once in a while I get a guest, like P.'s mom, who needs constant updates and pictures of how their pups are doing while in my care. Of course, I understand, so I mentally prepare to spend the next couple of days with my phone glued to my hand.

11:45 a.m. — I play with the dogs for almost two hours straight, making sure B. is kind to P. Then I tell BD to keep eyes and ears out for all the dogs and rush out to go volunteer at our local soup kitchen. I volunteer every second and fourth Friday of the month. My job is to help prepare and cook that night's dinner. We usually prepare bagged lunches, a fruit salad, a regular salad, an entree with bread and vegetables, and put out desserts. The ladies I work with are a lot older than me, and they're really sweet and very hard workers. I'm still fairly new at volunteering here but I work quietly, am comfortable around a kitchen, and I don't mind dealing with raw meat so they like that I'm around.

3 p.m. — I finish volunteering and return home to play with the dogs while BD picks up T. from school and takes him to his make-up piano lesson. I boil egg noodles for the Mississippi pot roast, and when they get back I give T. his dinner a little early. He needs to go to bed right after our Cub Scout meeting because we have to meet at the basketball court tomorrow at 7:45 a.m. for his first game and I want him to get a full night's rest.

5:45 p.m. — I drive T. to his Cub Scout meeting. Since BD is the den leader, he's already there. Today's meeting will be cool! We get to tour a fire station. I silently pray that the rest of the Scouts listen well and show respect during the tour because we have a couple disruptive kids in the den. I don't have the most patience for parents who choose to ignore when their kids are misbehaving or being disrespectful in a certain setting. The excuse “kids will be kids” means nothing to me. It's your job to teach and encourage them to be better little humans! Get your house in order! Unexpected rant over. Another mom brings some yummy snacks, and I get T. to eat some so he can't stall and say he's hungry when we when get home.

7:30 p.m. — We get home and I put T. to bed. It's way earlier than his usual weekend bedtime, but I don't want to deal with a cranky tired child at 7 in the morning tomorrow. BD and I eat dinner (I eat the roast over salad), and I play a quick video game before I remind BD to let the dogs out before he goes to bed. I scoop up P. and we go snuggle together.

Daily Total: $1

Day Six

6 a.m. — Ugh! Getting up this early on a Saturday sucks. I let the pups out before I feed them. I make breakfast for T. and then get his basketball stuff together. I play fetch with the dogs as long as I can but then have to get T. up and ready, too. BD finally rolls out of bed, and we are out the door by 7:15 am.

9 a.m. — The coaches pumps up the kids and the crowd with loud music. It wakes them up and we win! I feel like we have a very strong team this year, but I admit the coaches are fantastic. They know what they're doing and can easily command the team's attention. I'm super proud of T. and shower him with praises in the car for hustling and being present in the game. I normally don't like to leave my dog guests alone for too long so I calculate to see if we have time for breakfast, and we do. BD orders corned beef has and a waffle, T. orders pancakes, and I have a bun-less burger with a side salad. $40

10:45 a.m. — We get home and play with the dogs outside. B. gets a little snippy with P. for no reason so I put her back inside, and she howls loudly. I firmly reprimand her, and she sits forlornly by the door and gives me puppy eyes while I play with our dog and T. plays with P. After a while I put P. inside with T. and bring B. back outside to play. BD catches up on housework, and T. plays near him and helps out when he can.

12 p.m. — I spend 15 minutes doing my nails. I use Marmalade nails, and they are the best thing I discovered in 2018! They are high quality press on nails that you glue on that stay on for up to 12 days. I usually do them the day after I volunteer at the soup kitchen because even though I have faith in how strong Marmalade’s glue is, I would be horrified if I found out I lost a nail in one of the dishes. Today I use the Mirror Mirror color and it looks like liquid chrome. They reflect off my face, they’re so bright. As an Asian in this small country town, I gotta say these nails turn a lot of heads. I get them for me, but honestly, I live for the compliments, too. I go online and buy three more packs of various designs. $47

3 p.m. — We go for a family bike ride close to town. Normally we like to go down the hill to a trail about a 40 minute drive away but I don't want to leave the dogs for too long. We have snacks and stop for multiple breaks while T. tries to convince us to buy him a new bike that has gears.

7 p.m. — We prepare dinner which is a Sriracha pork stir fry with rice that ends up being too spicy for T., so he eats leftovers. I eat the pork with salad. We end up playing video games and board games all night. I learned how to play a game called Rummikub over Christmas, and I'm hooked. I take the dogs out one more time and then get both T. and myself ready for bed. BD is more of a night owl so he stays up and watches shows and plays more video games.

Daily Total: $87

Day Seven

7 a.m. — The pups allow me to sleep in until 7. I sneak out of bed so T. and BD can sleep in longer. I take the dogs out, feed them, and play with them. Then I start the laundry, finish the dishes, water my plants, change the covers on my couch, and wipe down the cabinets and counters. When the fam gets up we go for bagels. BD orders a breakfast sandwich bagel with coffee, and T. and I order a lox bagel. Yes, T. eats very well for a six-year-old. My bagel is not keto friendly but I scarf it up and feel good about my life choices. $30

11 a.m. — Its a normal lazy Sunday. We all lay around but then I get T. to do the day's chore: wipe down all door handles and light switches. I surprise him with a playdate with our neighbor's son, but I make sure he practices the piano, starts on his homework, and reads to me before we can go. I walk him down the street, and he happily runs off to play. I'm grateful that our neighbor's child is the same age is T., and they are both sweet, well-mannered kids who play great together! I'm also grateful that T.'s at an age where I don't have to stay with him on playdates so I rush back home to let the dogs out again. Then I start reading the Japanese travel books I borrowed from the library, and I end up taking notes for the next few hours.

2:30 p.m. — BD and I pick T. up from his playdate and take him to his indoor soccer game. The kids in this league are on a whole other level than the kids in T.'s regular league, so he's always out of his element. I know T. would rather not play in these games because he's always the weakest player but I encourage him to try his hardest. He will never get better if he's not challenged. I remind him that most of the players are older than him and praise him for all the times he's managed to touch the ball in the past. Last fall I coached T.'s soccer team. I had a very strong team, and we ended up on top but T. didn't play as well as he's capable of playing. I'm not sure if it was because I was coach or because his heart wasn't in it, but until he figures it out, we've been going to soccer clinics every month to ensure it doesn't happen again. This practice he does much better than normal, and I leave in good spirits.

5 p.m. — BD is hungry and wants to go eat at his favorite Chinese restaurant. We order wonton soup, kung pao chicken, and beef-and-ginger stir fry with fried rice ($65). Everything is delicious but would taste better if I had carbs. Afterwards, we stop at Baskin Robins for ice cream ($10). I take a lick of T.'s sherbet and try BD's mint chocolate chip ice cream while wishing it was the Brownie Mashup flavor, but I don't get any ice cream of my own. $75

7:30 p.m. — I feed the dogs and then give both dog guests a once over before they get picked up. On Rover, the guests get charge the moment we both agree on a reservation, but I don't get paid until two days after they get picked up. T. does his usual bedtime routine and heads to sleep while BD watches a movie and I read my travel books. I wait for both guests to go home. Once they do, I let our dog out one more time then make T.'s school lunch. Afterwards, I do my face, brush my teeth, chug water, and go to sleep by 11.

Daily Total: $105

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On Sunday night, there's set to be a rare "super blood wolf moon " from 9:36 p.m. EST to 12:31 a.m. EST. Despite the werewolf undertones of its name, a "super blood wolf moon" is not as spooky as it sounds. Really, a "super blood wolf moon" is just a lunar eclipse that occurs on the first full moon of the year — but it's still a powerful, transformative time.

Whenever a full moon is described as "super," it's referring to its relative proximity to earth in its orbit, explains Laura Tempest Zakroff, modern traditional witch and author of Weave the Liminal: Living Modern Traditional Witchcraft. "This closeness makes the moon visually appear a little bigger for us in the sky than usual, though this can happen several times during a lunar year," she says. "Blood" refers to the "reddish hue the earth's shadow casts on the Moon during a lunar eclipse," she says. And "wolf moon" is typically the nickname given to the first full moon in January, possibly to represent wolves' mating season in January and February, says Mickie Mueller, author of The Voice of the Trees.

In addition to the particularly vibrant hues, the moon's energy may feel stronger than usual, given its closeness to earth, Mueller says. Lunar eclipses are often associated with change, mystery, and upheaval, Tempest Zakroff says. "As this one coincides with the first full moon of the regular calendar year, it's a good time to contemplate what things — ideas, habits, practices — you may wish to leave behind, and what you want to bring into your life and build upon for the year to come," she says. Many of us made ambitious resolutions at the start of the new year, and this weekend is a good time to reevaluate what's serving us, and what's no longer useful. "It's a magical reset button," Mueller says.

As you settle into your Sunday scaries this weekend, take a break to gaze at the super blood wolf moon and reflect. The super blood wolf moon should be visible throughout North America, South America, Europe, and Africa. Its colors will peak around 10:34 p.m. EST, when the "partial" eclipse begins, and the total eclipse will be around midnight, according to AccuWeather. And although hanging out outdoors in the middle of the night in January sounds miserable, the next total lunar eclipse won't happen until May 26, 2021. And in case you don't feel like looking IRL, there are also a number of YouTube channels that will be streaming the super blood wolf moon online.

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A show a about single mom who is down on her luck and also horny is about as taboo as TV gets, but the Showtime series SMILF is the rare gem that manages to disrupt with unapologetic verve. Set in Boston’s historically blue collar Southie neighborhood, the show centers on Bridgette Bird, a young, struggling mom of a toddler, who is totally lost, troubled by a traumatic past, but doing her best. In the iconic pilot episode, she’s seen at a bodega running into an old friend while buying cookies, chips, popcorn, and more cookies for a binge. Back at her one-room apartment, Bridgette demands he strip so they can get down to business. Only there's someone else in the bed — Bridgette’s 2-year-old son, Larry Bird. The dude spooks, and Bridgette is pissed — with him but also with herself. It’s a moment where Brigette realizes she’s being reckless, while viewers of SMILF get a window into a gritty reality that’s not often seen on TV. For Frankie Shaw, the creator, showrunner, and star of SMILF (as in "single mom I'd like to fuck”), the scenario isn’t as far-fetched as you'd think.

Yet, as Shaw and I stroll around Echo Park in Los Angeles, it’s clear that scene is far from her mind now. Partly that’s because the second season is set to make waves when it premieres on Showtime this Sunday, but also because what’s been really occupying her headspace for the past month is instead the rather dry task of perfecting her management skills.

“I’m deep in reading these management books,” she says, as we’re sitting on a bench overlooking the man-made lake, with couples in swan-shaped paddle boats floating by us. She shivers a bit on this chilly-for-L.A.-day, showing she may have grown up in Massachusetts, but after a decade in Hollywood, she’s a California girl now. “These management books” include a giant stack of “like 400” Harvard Business Review back issues, as well as Kim Scott’s beloved management manifesto, Radical Candor, a book that espouses the complicated art of being blunt and empathetic at the same time.

“How do we create an environment where people can feel seen and heard at all levels?” Shaw says. Though she specializes in writing working-class loudmouths, she herself speaks slowly and thoughtfully. “I truly believe conversation is the only corrective mechanism. It’s so important to create an environment where that can happen. I didn’t know that before. I started off as an actress and someone who had written and directed short films. And then I was in charge of a humongous production.”

Camilla and Marc blazer and top; Rachel Comey trousers.

Until recently, Shaw’s story was a blemish-free feminist triumph. I’d describe her as the next Diablo Cody, writing cuttingly honest women-centered comedies. Although she’s been a working actress for more than a decade, her star exploded when SMILF got picked up by Showtime in 2016. The show is loosely based on her own experience as a struggling single mom, and has been lauded by the Los Angeles Times as “a premium-cable version of Roseanne for the millennial generation.” In truth, even that falls short of describing its complexity. Bridgette Bird (played by Shaw) isn’t just a scrappy single mom; she’s a trauma survivor (she was molested by her father) with an intact sexual drive daring to dream of becoming an actress and a pro basketball player. She’s got a bipolar mom (Tutu, played by Rosie O’Donnell), a recovering alcoholic baby daddy (Rafi, played by Miguel Gomez), and a best friend from her eating disorder support group (Eliza, played by Raven Goodwin) as her only support. The narrative thrust of the entire first season is about what it’s like to move through life operating as a full, flawed human being, despite being violated and traumatized at every turn for daring to do so.

The second season promises to pick up where season 1 left off, with Bridgette searching for her abusive dad, and ( spoiler) finding out he’s recently died. Like a lot of things in the show, this is somewhat similar to Shaw’s real life; her own father passed away during the filming of SMILF season 1, after having not spoken to his daughter since she was around 7.

“My dad had died. So if season 1 was about trauma, then season 2 was about what if something you used to identify yourself with goes away? Who are you then? That and the masks we all wear to present ourselves to others,” Shaw says. In that vein we can expect an episode focused solely on the housekeepers employed by Ally, Bridgette’s rich-lady boss (she’s the spoiled kids’ tutor) played by Connie Britton, and an episode in which Eliza and Bridgette talk frankly about their interracial friendship, and the divisions even their love for one another can’t erase.

Camilla and Marc top; Cynthia Rowley Silver Lake Maxi Dress, $525, available at Cynthia Rowley; Tibi slides.

The show is edgy, and relevant — Bridgette literally gets pussy-grabbed at one point during season 1, and lest you think it’s just a political statement, it really did happen (to Shaw! on the New York City subway.) It is also diverse and women-centered, both on-screen and behind the scenes. Nine out of season 2’s 10 episodes were directed by women, 50% of the 200-person crew was female, and a third of the writers were women of color. “I have been on a lot of sets that felt a little colder, and I wanted the set to feel warm and welcoming and like a family,” she says.

This is why it was such a shock last month when The Hollywood Reporter published allegations of mismanagement and misconduct on Shaw’s set. The allegations included complaints about writing credits and chaos on set, as well as more damning assertions that writers were split up by race and that Shaw pressured co-star Samara Weaving, who plays Nelson Rose, Rafi’s girlfriend, to perform nude despite that allegedly being a breach of her contract. (Weaving declined to comment to THR, nor has she spoken publicly elsewhere. )

In addition, during season 2’s shooting, on a rare day when Shaw was not on set, a monitor was flipped on during the filming of a sex scene when the set was supposed to be closed for the comfort of the actors. This incident was alleged to be a final straw for Weaving. “I just feel really bad that she felt uncomfortable,” Shaw says humbly. “As the showrunner, I totally take responsibility. I can say I’m truly sorry that the wrong monitor was turned on that day.” (Requests for comment sent to Weaving’s reps were not returned by press time; Shaw would not comment on whether Weaving will return for season 3). Since then, ABC Studios, which produces the show, has closed its investigation, clearing Shaw of any wrongdoing, and the second season is still set to premiere according to plan. And yet, Shaw is obviously a bit rattled.

In Echo Park, a month after the shit hit the fan, I don’t even have to ask her about the controversy. She brings it up when I mention how she lights up talking about minute production details. “I really love every moment of filmmaking. I truly do. When I’m in a scene and I’m directing, it’s just intuitive. You’re just there,” she says. “But what I wasn’t aware of about this job when I started was how much management is involved. I’m coming off this season totally surprised. We have such a family, but that anyone would not feel that… How do I do better next time? That is a real focus.” Hence, the management books.

Cinq à Sept top; Tibi dress.

This isn’t the first time SMILF has been criticized, but it is the first time Shaw has been at all contrite. In 2018, when the show was blasted by a Boston city councilor for being “degrading” and “crude” and portraying Southie in a bad light, Shaw hit back with a lengthy Facebook post that argued in part, “I have a feeling that the judgement comes from underlying gender-bias more than anything else.” She’s been criticized for the title, and for supposedly painting all single moms as irresponsible. She never guessed she’d also be called out for alleged misconduct, but it’s saying something about her that this is the only controversy she’s seems to have cared about in the slightest. “Anytime you stand up for something there is more of a spotlight on you,” she says. “What I’m learning through this whole thing is just that things require more work and more care.”

Another lesson: She can’t do everything herself. SMILF is incredibly personal to her, and hard-won. It is set in South Boston, the working class, Irish-Catholic neighborhood, where Shaw was born. Though she mostly grew up in nearby suburban Brookline (the birthplace of JFK), her mother’s family is “all Southie,” and she spent much of her childhood with her aunts and cousins in the neighborhood. When she was 4, her parents split. Like her character, Shaw was raised by a single mom before becoming one herself at 25. Just like Bridgette, Shaw played basketball growing up (and dreamed of joining the WNBA), and got a scholarship to a fancy Boston private school. When it comes to the Bridgette’s trauma, Shaw is vague but firm. “There are similarities,” she says.

Once she got to Barnard in New York City, she was exposed to art and literature and acting classes, and perhaps most crucially, Julia Stiles, who by that time (the early ‘00s) had already starred in Save The Last Dance and 10 Things I Hate About You. “I always wanted to write and be a filmmaker. But I was in school, taking acting classes, and the path to acting seemed like something I could do,” she says. “I didn’t know any filmmakers or writers, but I was in classes with Julia Stiles, and it became this thing like, oh maybe I could do this?” Shaw threw herself into acting. She got an agent, and landed some small roles.

Cinq à Sept top; Tibi dress.

In 2004, she walked in Barnard’s graduation, but she was actually one credit shy of getting her diploma. After taking some time off, she came back with a plan: She would earn her last credit by writing her first script, convincing writer-director and Columbia professor Katherine Dieckmann to mentor her through an independent study program. Dieckmann said no at first, but Shaw was persistent: She wrote her a letter and hand-delivered it along with bagels. With Dieckmann’s mentorship, Shaw went on to write her script about a lonely Boston girl who gets involved with a veteran suffering from PTSD, and with that she graduated from Columbia in 2007.

She was dating the actor Mark Webber (aka Father Eddy in SMILF), when she got pregnant later that year. "It was this crazy young love that is not sustainable,” Shaw says. She got an abortion. It wasn’t an easy decision for her, due to how lonely she felt at the time. So, when she got pregnant again 6 months later, she decided to keep the baby. At that point, “basically, I knew I wasn’t going to stay with the baby’s dad, and I decided to move to L.A. alone.” Webber and Shaw, in the meantime, remain close friends and co-parents.

The next few years of her life were spent moving apartments every few months with her infant son, Isaac, and struggling to survive. She tutored college-bound kids for money, and did small parts. What she really wanted to do was write. In 2012, she wrote a pilot about a single mom in an effort to get a staff writing job. She never got one, but she did randomly meet the director Catherine Hardwicke ( Twilight, Lords of Dogtown) on a plane soon after. This led to an audition, which led to some discussion, which led to Shaw sending Hardwicke her pilot, which Hardwicke loved.

Ultimately, she decided to make a short film version of her pilot. In February 2015, the short, also called SMILF, won the jury prize at Sundance, which got the industry’s attention. “I had just spent like nine years of getting rejected as an actress. I was a full-time auditioner,” she says. “It was so rewarding to see something that I made from scratch get that response.” By March she had a development deal with Showtime, and in August 2016 she got the greenlight to shoot SMILF’s pilot episode.

Rachel Comey top.

For the first two seasons, Shaw was doing the jobs of at least three people at any given time: She’s the showrunner on a set with a 215-person crew, the lead actress, and executive producer. She’s also a writer, and she directed the pilot. It’s a full load, which might help explain the alleged chaos.

“I don’t know what I am first. I’m as first a director as I am first a writer, so because of that I need to be on set, and then on top of that I’m mostly in the show,” Shaw says. “I’m trying to figure out a way to have more support this season, so I can focus on one or two of the jobs at a time. I could only learn that by going through it.”

In regards to the alleged separation of writers by race and the issues with credit, Shaw says there were times when writers were split into groups, but that race was never a factor. “Sometimes we would split up the room into small groups, which is normal in writers’ rooms,” she says. “It is so important to me to have inclusivity. If anyone felt left out it was never the intention.” She adds that all writers in the room have script credits on season 2.

As for Weaving, Shaw blames her interaction on a misguided ignorance of her own power. The Hollywood Reporter reported that during filming for season 1, Shaw pressured Weaving to perform nude. Shaw tells me that she recalls the incident, but she didn’t mean to pressure anyone. She and Weaving were both in the makeup trailer (along with hair and makeup stylists), and Shaw had lifted her shirt, in an effort to express her own experiences and discomfort with having done sex scenes herself. “This was part of the learning curve, where I didn’t know as a showrunner you’re not really supposed to talk about what the actor’s comfortable with. I was coming in as an actress,” she explains. “My intention was to connect and instead it made her uncomfortable. I didn’t find that out until the second season wrapped. And I get it. People don’t talk about things until they do. But I didn’t know, and I’m just sad that I wasn’t able to address it.”

“I will just say that this whole thing has made me a huge proponent of intimacy coordinators,” Shaw adds, referring to a new person hired to be present on film sets, which has become more popular in the past year or so. Essentially, the intimacy coordinator’s job is to be the point person for all nude or intimate scenes, making sure the actors are comfortable and safe.

All in all, Shaw says the fact that this has played out very publicly pains her, but ultimately, “I’m learning what I can from this.” Shaw is immensely proud of how season 2 is shaping up (she is still working on the last few episodes), and she can’t wait for everyone to see it. (Heads up: the first season is available in full on YouTube and the premiere is already online for Showtime subscribers.)

This year, fans of the show will get to go deeper into the stories of the supporting cast, learning more about Bridgette and Rafi’s deep love for one another. We'll get Bridgette’s birth story, with Ally Sheedy (of The Breakfast Club fame) playing Bridgette’s no nonsense midwife. Fans of the show’s surreal side will also have plenty to look forward to this season as well: From an extended “welfare queen” fantasy that asks the question, “What if we lived in a world where you were compensated for doing the most important job in the world, which is being a mother?,” Shaw says, to an episode about a Western fantasy in which the women are the gunslingers and the men stay home.

I ask her if she feels like she’s under extra pressure as a feminist creator who is also a feminist boss. “There’s an archetype that people are familiar with as leaders of a company for example, and if you’re not that, then I’m sure there is a different way of interpreting things,” she says. But as far as the show goes, “I don’t like to think about it like, ‘Oh what is my responsibility to the viewer?’ It’s more like how do we process the world right now?” she says, gesturing to nowhere. She stands up, ready to start walking again. “And how do we tell a good story?”

Update (1/17/19): This text was updated to clarify that Shaw was not on set the day of the monitor issue, and that Weaving has not commented on any allegations.

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