Exactly one year ago today, Refinery29 published its very first money diary, and we watched, surprised, as readers commented on everything from the diarist's eating habits to her job prospects to the seemingly out-of-nowhere line of coke.
We've published 102 diaries since then, and it's been quite a journey. We've gone as far as Singapore and Australia, found variety in the many, many diarists of New York City, and discovered the countless ways women spend and save their money regardless of salary.
To celebrate the one year anniversary of the series, we reached out to every single diarist to ask what they learned from the experience. Did they change any of their spending habits? Did they love or hate the comments? Did they, in the end, learn more about their money?
Ahead, 30 diarists reflect on their experience with the Money Diary community. And, as we continue to grow our pool of submissions, we'd like to say thank you for being a reader, a writer, a critic, or all three. We're opening up our submissions to include diarists of any gender, and we hope the series continues to be an eye-opening experience for everyone.
Have a Money Diary you'd like to share? Fill out our submission form here.
"I was spending too much on coffee! I've stopped doing that and am contributing $3 a day to a savings account specifically reserved for seeing Britney Spears in Las Vegas using the app Qapital.
"Also, as much as I was constantly concerned about money before doing the money diary, now I think about it even more. It made me want to keep one all the time!" — A Week In NYC On A $40k Salary
"I learned that (to me at least) money diaries are about how people spend their money — whether the money comes from a steady paycheck or a savings account is irrelevant. I think it's a great habit to physically write down spending habits because visually seeing the amounts total up is a lot more intense than just swiping a credit card. I learned that I'm good about not overspending, but also that when I do spend, it is usually on food.
"Also, I loved participating in this! I read the diaries (and other articles, too) religiously. I just graduated early from UCLA, so my entire world is shifting from college student to full-time employee in the 'real world.' Maybe I will submit a new money diary to compare!" — A Week In Los Angeles On A UCLA Student's Budget
"I loved reading the responses — especially from someone nervous about moving to my city on a similar budget. After reading my article, she felt better about being able to afford to live in Philly!
"While that week I had some big expenses (a vet visit and a Keratin treatment), I was definitely more conscious of saving on small things like packing lunch and taking advantage of free food at work." — 6 Women Get Real About How They Spend Their Diverse Salaries: Philadelphia
"The experience was an interesting one! Through keeping the diary, I learned that even though I was trying to be spendthrift and cut back on certain items, I was still spending way too much on coffees and expensive lunches because I wasn't being prepared and making lunches, etc. at home or keeping up with grocery shopping.
"Since the diary, I've made more of an effort to skip eating and drinking out as those seemingly small expenses were really adding up. The experience, and the comments, also inspired me to finally take the plunge and dive into a vegan lifestyle after somewhat haphazardly trying to transition to vegetarian/gluten-free before.
"Someone commented, 'Live your compassionate truth,' and I thought, W hy not ? It propelled me to think a little deeper about what was important to me and inspired me to do a little more research. Overall, a positive experience!" — A Week In Chicago On A $42,000 Salary
"I enjoyed doing the money diary. It definitely made me more conscious of my spending, and I was actually pretty happy with how I was already managing my money. It also made me very aware of how much cheaper things would be once I left NYC, and I can definitely confirm that after having moved.
"The other thing I noticed was how judgmental the commenters — and myself — can be while reading a one-week glimpse into a person they know literally nothing about. For example, I have no loans because I paid them off already, and what loans I did have were likely minimal compared to others because I stayed in-state and worked the whole time I was in school.
"People don't know everything about the diarist, and so they automatically jump to conclusions. I noticed how much I was doing that when I read other peoples' diaries, so I think it helped make me think twice before judging their week. I also thought it was funny that people in the comment section were so hung up on my rent. I wanted to tell them it was a shithole fourth-floor walk-up that had been on fire twice during the four years I lived there. LOL." — A Week In NYC On A $291,000 Joint Salary
"I learned that I took money for granted. I wrote a money diary while I was unemployed and tracking money down to the cent was exhausting and eye-opening. I also realized that saving money isn't nearly as important as budgeting money. Spending $20 on groceries is not the same as spending $20 on a T-shirt." — A Week Being Unemployed In New Jersey
"Even though a few commenters were pretty quick to judge me on a single week of my spending (I'm looking at you, dude who commented, 'She's so terrible oh my god'), I was really surprised and happy to see that my money diary was relatable to so many women. Secondly, I learned how valuable tracking my spending can be. I was on my best behavior, in terms of my spending, when I knew I'd be submitting this money diary to Refinery29. Tracking my spending more consistently has definitely helped me stay within my budget." — A Week In Los Angeles On A $61,800 Salary
"For me, the most surprising thing was the overwhelmingly positive feedback from Refinery29's readers. I was a bit worried that people would be super harsh about being the 'I quit my job to travel' stereotype, but people were very kind and encouraging. It felt very nice to see such support!" — How One Woman Quit Her Job To Travel The World
"I loved the process of actually thinking about what I was purchasing. I track every single penny I spend in an app, but I don't normally include this level of detail. It was a good reflection process. I did think it was interesting how people responded to my diary very negatively, whether by criticizing my spending, doubting how hard I work by saying I don't deserve my salary, or that I am defrauding my company by doing certain things. I hated my boyfriend seeing it after I said people were being mean and having him be surprised at my spending!" — A Week In NYC On A $240,000 Salary
"I was surprised about how much I really spend versus how much I thought I spend. (I spend way more than I think on things I cannot remember.) I enjoy reading everyone's entries, however I do notice some commenters are quite harsh. One comment to my post was, and I quote, 'I almost puked in my mouth when she said she travels with her dog in an Uber.' I think in the U.S. [it may sound] extreme but that's definitely the most cost-effective transportation mode in Singapore. So I guess a bit more context about the cost of living of the cities in which the writer resides in would be helpful to make the post more relatable." — A Week In Singapore On A $118,000 Salary
"I think the week I chose was a good week for me (which is probably why I chose it, because I didn't feel that bad about it) and that I am cognizant of trying to cut corners where I can (by ordering pizza instead of going out, for example, and by using airline miles to visit my long distance boyfriend, because those regular flights were hitting my bank account hard). I also realized after looking at that week that I probably let my BF pay for too many things! I thought I was better about splitting things than I am!" — A Week In Austin On A $100,000 Salary
"I am getting ready to leave my $600 digs — I've signed a lease and am purchasing furniture — and let me just say, I don't regret that aggressive savings strategy one bit. I'm glad I have it now to help me with my move!" — A Week In Silicon Valley On A $100,000 Salary
"First, in relation to wedding planning, I completely under-budgeted what I expected to spend just in the last two weeks of the wedding. [But] overall, the process taught me to keep track of the minor things I spend my money on. They add up quickly! My normal process is to budget down to the last dollar, and that tends to stress me out when I reach my last $100 or so. The money diary helped me realize that having some money as a buffer allowed me to feel more comfortable. Also, the tracking helped me feel more in control. I see a similarity between eating healthy and budgeting — when I write down what I eat or spend, I tend to be more thoughtful and make better decisions." — A Week Planning A Wedding: Denver
"So something I learned about doing the money diary process would definitely be that I show up to work hungover and needing a latte way more than necessary — however, I swear that's not common practice. I feel pretty good about my weekly spending but I have started tracking it more and being more conscious about where my money is going. I love reading other people's money diaries and try not to judge too much on spending habits because it's hard to stick to a budget sometimes. My husband and I recently looked into relocating to California for a job opportunity for him, and it was insane how much the cost of living there was going to affect our current lifestyle — especially since we both have really awesome paying jobs for our age. We know we are extremely lucky and try not to take it for granted.
"Also, I feel like the commenters went way easy on me, but that might be because, on paper, it looks like my life is pretty together. Trust me, [that's] not the case at all — life is hard!" — A Week In Houston On A $108,000 Salary
"I was always worried about over-spending, to the point that when I saw the diary, I saw how LITTLE I spent. While I believe in keeping a budget and not wasting money, I've since tried to loosen up and not fear a small coffee as a treat now and then." — A Week In Washington, D.C., On An $80K Salary
"In doing money diaries and generally tracking my money, I realize I spend a fair amount on gifts for friends — books especially. I've put myself on a 'gift budget' limiting how much I spend on gifts, but it's hard, especially with books because they bring me so much joy and I hope they bring my friends joy in reading them." — A Week In London On A $108,000 Salary
"It was eye-opening to write my daily routine down. My father said last year that he knows many people who make three times what I do, and yet, I am living better, not simply existing. I agree. I could be a little looser and have a little more fun; I could not hide from the reality of my hermit tendencies when they were blaring at me from the website. The grass is always greener.
"Every single comment was a compliment, and the positive, anonymous feedback was spectacular. But overseas, just like in the States, the struggle is real, the problems increasing. There is something beautiful about Americans; how quickly they can unite, and how quickly they can divide. I miss this at times; at times, no." — A Week In Rome On A $40,000 Salary
"I think the biggest thing I learned after my money diary was that I was being a little too strict with how I was spending my money. This year I paid down over $10k in debt, but felt at times like I couldn't go out and have fun or buy stuff like socks. I'm very proud of the progress I made with my debt, but I've also learned to budget some for the fun stuff...and the socks." — A Week In America On A $65,000 Salary: Washington, D.C.
"It was disappointing that commenters nitpicked the little things I splurged on (celebratory champagne with my high school BFF), while nobody acknowledged how much I have in savings — a chunk of change I'm pretty proud of. I've learned that I'm more responsible with my spending than I give myself credit for...tracking everything definitely made me realize that." — A Week In NYC On A $36,000 Salary
"Learned: Compared to other contributors, I feel like I'm underpaid! Most important thing I learned is that I'm terrible at budgeting.
"Hated: Yes [commenters] are harsh and judgmental. Living in NY is expensive. It's difficult to have any social life without spending a dime." — "Trying To Bring Lunch To Work More Often," Says Everyone, Ever.
"My diary was during a week of very unusual, very high spending as I stocked up on items at Costco. I'm actually still using a lot of the stuff up! But in re-reading the diary, I realized I definitely overspent on items I really don't need to be buying in bulk (I may never finish that vegan protein powder...), and on my most recent Costco trip, I spent a tiny fraction of what I would usually spend and still had plenty of stuff to fill the fridge. Just because I don't get to Costco often doesn't mean I need to buy the entire store, and I'll save money in the future by being more thoughtful about those types of purchases. I've started keeping a money diary, just for me, to see if I can identify any other places to save." — A Week In Philadelphia On A $57,200 Salary
"My habits haven't changed much since tracking my spending habits — largely because I don't have a lot of discretionary income right now! However, my husband has recently gone vegan (he is lactose intolerant, and decided to also do an elimination diet to identify other possible stomach issues). Because of this diet change, we've had to be much more creative with meal planning and cooking, and we have ended up going over our $100/week food budget the last two weeks in a row. Still trying to figure out a way to make meals diverse, filling, and budget-friendly!
"Also, I realized after tracking my spending that I should be much better about having a 'gift fund' for birthdays, holidays, weddings, and showers. Four of our friends are getting married within six months of each other, and both my husband and I have wedding party roles in a couple of them. I think our bank account is about to grow wings! Ideally, we should at least throw $20 each month into a gift fund so it makes less of a ding when these occasions inevitably arise! The thing that was most inspiring was reading the comments on my diary. I got a lot of positive feedback. I have to say, as someone who often feels conflicted about passing on social events because of lack of funds, it was nice to be recognized for not living beyond my means. I do still have a social life — I just do things like have friends over to share a bottle of wine, coffee dates, and matinee movies." — A Week In Orange County On A $40,000 Joint Salary
"My diary reflected my life as a college student and paid intern making a little above minimum wage, and I definitely received a lot of negative feedback in the comments about spending above my means.
"Looking back on that diary now, I actually feel proud of how I managed my money. Living in an expensive city, I have to spend more on transportation, food, and rent than some people, and while I certainly could have skipped a couple Starbucks runs or opted for a cheaper lunch, my spending was not extravagant.
"In addition, readers of my diary wouldn’t necessarily have known that I worked through high school and college to save a substantial amount of money to live off of. This means that I am not solely relying on my current income, but also pulling from that savings account when needed. I think anyone willing to track their spending for a week is generally conscious of their budget, which is why I read every diary with an open mind." — A Week In Washington, D.C., On An Intern's Salary
"What I learned from the Money Diary process is that the commenters seem to have NO IDEA that these diaries are user submitted. They constantly blame Refinery29 for 'being out of touch' when they could easily submit their own and be judged if they wanted. I also learned that if I give my fiancé exactly half of the amount of money it takes to pay our bills, but he goes online and pays them, 'I have my boyfriend pay all my bills for me like a spoiled brat.' Erm, no. We split the bills, thanks.
"Lastly, I learned that there are a number of lucky young ladies out there who have parents with the capability to pay for things such as phones and health insurance for them. I am not one of these ladies but IF my mother could pay for these things for me she certainly would! Can't we lift each other up? Can't you see that someone has something going for them that (for the time being) makes things a bit easier? Is that not ok? We all have different life experiences and there in no point in putting someone down when they are being helped, even if that is not the way your life went. Try being happy for other people, it feels better." — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: Denver
"Money Diaries was SO fun for me to write! It made me hyper aware of every cent I was spending and it was definitely eye-opening to see how much I was spending, especially on coffee and cabs. Now I try and take the subway as much as possible, although my coffee is non-negotiable." — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: New York
"Keeping track of my weekly spending to write a money diary helped me become more aware of my personal finances. I realized that it's actually not hard to watch closely what I spend my money on, but it's something most people (me included!) rarely do for some reason. I also acknowledged that I'm probably spending too much on groceries and not enough on entertainment. After all, I'm only 24, and YOLO, right?" — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: Boston
"Since I already keep track of my expenses via an Excel sheet, as well as a notebook detailing exactly what I actually spent the money on (shampoo at CVS, lunch at Chipotle, etc.), I loved the concept of a money diary. It allowed me to expand these thoughts, and turn what I was spending money on into more of a personal story.
"It also taught me that it is OK to make a big purchase or two once in a while, especially if it's in my budget! It might seem scary to spend that much money on one item, but if it is worth it and you can afford it, go for it. I also learned that many commenters were quick to judge those who 'got free money from their parents' — this is the only part I disliked. It is unfair to try and gauge someone's whole financial situation by a few paragraphs about what they spend money on, or how much they 'get from their parents.' It also doesn't make them less independent, and there are often many other circumstances involved. Overall it was a great experience, and I was able to learn more about my spending and saving habits, while hopefully giving others insight as well!" — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: San Francisco
"While putting together my money diary, I realized that I need to be much more careful when writing out my expenses. I totally forgot to incorporate all the money that automatically goes into savings (which is a lot), my 401K, donations to charities and my alma mater, etc. I got skewered in the comments because I looked super irresponsible. Also, rereading it made me realize how desperate I was to form connections with my peers and that I used going out for food and coffee as a way to do so." — A Week In NYC On A $55,000 Salary
"I have actually found many benefits through reading other diaries versus creating my own. I have always been very on top of my spending by using Mint.com daily, but in reading other women’s journals, I have learned cool new savings ideas and gained general food for thought. Some have been ideas like buying toiletries in bulk off of Amazon or unplugging all electronics when not in use for a month, and then there’s general knowledge like how much people usually pay for their phones and groceries, as well as becoming aware of how much it can cost to raise a child.
"Money diaries have also inspired me to look into ways to reach women and share my tips and tricks about saving/spending. I received a number of comments from women saying they were impressed with my savings, and one even said I inspired her to leave her low paying job, which was the biggest compliment I could imagine. I am very passionate about empowering women to negotiate their salaries and save as much as possible so they can be completely independent (and be badasses in retirement!). I may try to start some sort of money blog to share my ideas." — A Week In Washington, D.C. On An $89,000 Salary
"By writing down what I spend and the circumstances around it, I was able to identify where and why I spend money — particularly the eating out. I could curb unnecessary lunches by planning better or having snacks when I travel. After publishing, I also realized even more how personal someone's financial decisions are. What appears to be a gamble to one person is a perfectly sound decision to another. The way that people spend their money is a peek into their personalities and what they value." — A Week In The Midwest On A $52,000 Salary
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