
If you've done some swiping on Tinder or Bumble, you might be familiar with a bio format that looks something like this:
"Michael deserves a 10 out of 10. A truly Oscar-worthy performance." — LA Times Movie Reviews
"Michael is an excellent speller." — Michael's First-Grade Teacher
"Michael is the best of my three sons." — Michael's Mom
The first couple of times you see these bios, they're funny. Then you realize that A) they're very common; and B) almost every person who does this thinks it's completely original and clever. News flash: It's neither original, nor clever.
But the last fake quote does touch on something we can all relate to: A collective sense of dread whenever our parents try to "do" social media. If your mom or dad is on Facebook, you're probably familiar with them liking everything you post, commenting at least once on each photo, and friending your friends from high school. Can you imagine the catastrophic, force five hurricane-level disaster that would result if they actually got ahold of your dating bio, Instagram bio, or Twitter bio?
This morning, a trending a Twitter hashtag, #IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio is taking that idea to the next level. And people are running wild with it, dreaming up bios that are painfully embarrassing, hilariously out-of-touch, and frighteningly realistic. Below, a collection of our favorites so far.
Please retweet my son, it would mean a lot to him, apparently his mother's love isn't enough for him.#IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio
— Jeff Dwoskin (@bigmacher) January 9, 2017
#IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio
— ThePublicGadfly (@ThePublicGadfly) January 9, 2017
A hashtag? Isn't that drugs? Oh my god, you're doing drugs! This will kill your father. Smoking hashtags? WHY?
She does something I don't understand on Twister. I do know she isn't paid. Two college degrees for nothing! 😠#IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio
— ChristineWatchaWant (@googlygirl98) January 9, 2017
#IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio he's a good boy who loves his mama, loves cooking and Amercia too...
— Logan Jr Chef (@LoganJrChef) January 9, 2017
Thinks he's a Big Shot. And he didn't learn those curse words in this house. #IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio
— Denis Leary (@denisleary) January 9, 2017
#IfYourMomWroteYourTwitterBio Tim is smart, funny, and good looking. He'd be better looking if he cut his hair, shaved & moved back home.
— Tim has issues (@LaptopShopWH) January 9, 2017
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
9 Ways To Get Your Financial Life In Order, Straight From Your Phone
Here's How People Reacted To The First iPhone Launch In 2007
Twitter Suspends Pharma Bro Martin Shkreli For Harassing Female Journalist