When it comes to unconventional beauty treatments, we're surprisingly eager to throw our bodies in the line of fire—especially when said fire happens to come in the form of caviar (or, even better, red wine). But, what happens when you tell us there's fecal matter (seriously) in our complexion-brightening facial? Well, our bravado goes out the window, that's what.
Still, it's January, and the pressure is on to keep our skin from drying out and our thighs from losing muscle tone. So, we researched eight crazy spa therapies right here in NYC that promise to trim our trouble spots, brighten our mugs — and yes, we even got our lady parts in on the action. From over-the-top luxe treatments to disconcerting methods that are less-than appealing at first blush, these are some of the craziest tightening, relaxing, and toning spa services in the Big Apple. Time to melt the holiday-season stress away!
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Elizabeth Arden SmoothSculpt Body Treatment
Remember that time Gwyneth Paltrow walked the red carpet with blue, circle-shaped bruises all over her back? Do you want to one-up Gwyneth Paltrow? The Red Door Spa’s SmoothSculpt Body Treatment, which also has roots in Asian holistic medicine, is said to offer the same lymphatic drainage (more on that later) as cupping, but without the pain and bruising. Sounds like a win to us! Sorry, Gwynie.
So why should we care about our lymphatic system? A sluggish one can be the culprit of low-energy and a dull complexion, so drainage — while not always necessary — keeps swelling and inflammation down. But because nobody’s fond of intentional bruising, the Red Door Spa created this non-invasive therapy that applies pulsating pressure and suction directly to the skin with a mechanical wand. The suction and pulse action of the wand helps to break down fat and stagnated fluid trapped within the layers of skin, and, if claims be true, promotes healthier blood flow for enhanced cell renewal. Yes, using electrodes to zap away flab seems like a ‘50s ad-gone-wrong, but SmoothSculpt is said to deliver smoother, tighter skin for an $80 one-hour session. The weirdest part? In addition to abdomen, thigh and buttocks treatments, you also have the option to do this on your face.
$80, available at Elizabeth Arden Red Door Spa, 663 Fifth Avenue (between 52nd and 53rd streets); 212-546-0200.
Euphoria Spa Sweet Cheeks Treatment
We can’t say we pay much attention to our behinds, save for when it’s downward dogging in a stranger's face twice a week (or when we’re squeezing it into a pair of new jeans). But if there’s any way to apologize for all the neglect, it’s with a 30-minute facial...for your butt.
Euphoria Spa’s Sweet Cheeks treatment — your ticket to a supermodel-status derriere — offers a fruit-enzyme peel and sugar scrub, which digests and sloughs off dead skin cells. The treatment is done by hand, and also uses a microcurrent to stimulate muscles for a temporary lift. Even better? The $75 service gets rid of unsightly bumps and breakouts, so it’s perfect for a little date-night prep. We just have to get over the awkwardness of someone other than our boyfriends putting their hands all over our butts.
$75, available at Euphoria Spa, 18 Harrison Street (between Hudson and Greenwich streets); 212-925-5925.
Photo: Courtesy of Elizabeth Arden
Still, it's January, and the pressure is on to keep our skin from drying out and our thighs from losing muscle tone. So, we researched eight crazy spa therapies right here in NYC that promise to trim our trouble spots, brighten our mugs — and yes, we even got our lady parts in on the action. From over-the-top luxe treatments to disconcerting methods that are less-than appealing at first blush, these are some of the craziest tightening, relaxing, and toning spa services in the Big Apple. Time to melt the holiday-season stress away!
Elizabeth Arden SmoothSculpt Body Treatment
Remember that time Gwyneth Paltrow walked the red carpet with blue, circle-shaped bruises all over her back? Do you want to one-up Gwyneth Paltrow? The Red Door Spa’s SmoothSculpt Body Treatment, which also has roots in Asian holistic medicine, is said to offer the same lymphatic drainage (more on that later) as cupping, but without the pain and bruising. Sounds like a win to us! Sorry, Gwynie.
So why should we care about our lymphatic system? A sluggish one can be the culprit of low-energy and a dull complexion, so drainage — while not always necessary — keeps swelling and inflammation down. But because nobody’s fond of intentional bruising, the Red Door Spa created this non-invasive therapy that applies pulsating pressure and suction directly to the skin with a mechanical wand. The suction and pulse action of the wand helps to break down fat and stagnated fluid trapped within the layers of skin, and, if claims be true, promotes healthier blood flow for enhanced cell renewal. Yes, using electrodes to zap away flab seems like a ‘50s ad-gone-wrong, but SmoothSculpt is said to deliver smoother, tighter skin for an $80 one-hour session. The weirdest part? In addition to abdomen, thigh and buttocks treatments, you also have the option to do this on your face.
$80, available at Elizabeth Arden Red Door Spa, 663 Fifth Avenue (between 52nd and 53rd streets); 212-546-0200.
Euphoria Spa Sweet Cheeks Treatment
We can’t say we pay much attention to our behinds, save for when it’s downward dogging in a stranger's face twice a week (or when we’re squeezing it into a pair of new jeans). But if there’s any way to apologize for all the neglect, it’s with a 30-minute facial...for your butt.
Euphoria Spa’s Sweet Cheeks treatment — your ticket to a supermodel-status derriere — offers a fruit-enzyme peel and sugar scrub, which digests and sloughs off dead skin cells. The treatment is done by hand, and also uses a microcurrent to stimulate muscles for a temporary lift. Even better? The $75 service gets rid of unsightly bumps and breakouts, so it’s perfect for a little date-night prep. We just have to get over the awkwardness of someone other than our boyfriends putting their hands all over our butts.
$75, available at Euphoria Spa, 18 Harrison Street (between Hudson and Greenwich streets); 212-925-5925.
Photo: Courtesy of Elizabeth Arden